Step 08

Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.

1. Primary principle(s): honesty, willingness, humility, responsibility
2. Other principles: amendment, forgiveness, accountability

Readings:

• Big Book pp. 76-84
• Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions pp. 77-82
• “The Chairman”, June 1952 AA Grapevine
• “How to Make Amends”, September 1955 AA Grapevine
• “Step Eight: the Years That the Locust Hath Eaten”, August 2005 AA Grapevine
• “Between A Bartender And A Bad-tempered Boss”, December 2006 AA Grapevine

I know some in the program of AA who simply draw a list off their 4th step for their 8th step list and go to it.  Most of my sponsors have been clear with me that the perpetrations I’ve committed in my live might be broader than those I’ve written about - especially given my new insight as a consequence of becoming clear about  “the exact nature of my wrongs” in my 5th step.

One thing I’ve learned for sure is that it’s never been advisable for me to start out making 9th step amends before going through the previous 8 steps and then reviewing my list with my sponsor.  I’ve never made an 8th step list and reviewed it with a sponsor but what he’s suggested I remove some names from the list.  Occasionally, a sponsor will also suggest names or institutions I should add as well.

My current process for this step is to, in prayerful contemplation, make a list with four columns:

1. The name of the person or institution to whom I owe an amend
2. The exact wrong/perpetration I’ve committed
3. The character defect that was “in play” as I committed this wrong
4. The amends that I feel compelled to offer

One thing that is clear at the beginning is that this is less about what my perspective is or what I’m offering than it is about repairing the damage I’ve caused and completely clearing up my side of the street.  I will not be limited to what’s on my list because I have agreed to go to “any lengths” and must inquire those two tricky little questions in the course of my actual amends:

1. Have I left anything out?
2. What can I do to make this right?

More on this in the discussion of the 9th step…